Heavenly Light

Heavenly Light
Read to see the light

Monday, February 05, 2007

My move to the Bay Area is basically my first step in the direction of real life. I gradutated with the idealism of all the revolutionaries combined and the naivity of any 23 year old. After a stint of traveling, not working, trying to save the world and reliving some past lives...I am finally ready to begin my life, my real life.

The road is long, windy and difficult. I have realized that many people my age experience the same feelings as me...a yearning for purpose and a disappointment when things dont go our way.

I have been at the peak of my job search. Trying to stick to my idealism, I refused to even look at what a corporation had to offer as far as employment. After a few drinks with my grandfather,and probably a few more with my father, all while trying to level the playing field, I realized that my ambitions couldnt catch up with my idealism. I have succumb to the evils of the corporate world, well at least I have sent out my resume to a few firms. After various phone interviews, it was good to see that there were fish on the other end of the line. However, nothing has come up after those interviews. However, I have talked with many a friend in the same stages of job hunting, and they have assured me that those only better prepare you for the right job...But the most frustrating thing is that all of the jobs that I have been interested in, sent my resume and personalized cover letter, have not even responded!

I know that if I stay persistant, the right things will happen. But its just frustrating that my ideals dont match up with the employers...or not even to the point of acknowledgement...I dont want phone interviews with marketing agencies, and they can tell that, but I keep sending my resume and they keep responding. I keep sending my resume to progressive groups, passionate about similar things, and nothing.

It seems like it may come to a point where one must relinquish our idealism and succumb to the abyss of the masses. And for me, thats not what I want. I will keep fighting and remain strong in my beliefs...but I am dead broke. I will be happy to work for minimal salary for an orgainzation or ideal that I believe in, but I also have to keep myself fed.

Its a vicious cycle and the real world is much more fierce than I expected...something my idealism didnt take into account...I will remain persistant, the right match for both of us is out there!

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